Wednesday, May 20, 2015

May 18, 2015. My beloved Lucky kitty is gone.

I got the call while I was at work.

I thought it might be about Lucky because he hadn't come home the night before. I was late getting home from work due to the arrest of a child molester, so when I pulled into my complex at 0230 I expected to see him waiting for me. He always hung around the driveway at 0130...and would sometimes follow my car in when I got home. He was a good boy, who loved his Mommy. But when I got out of the car and walked towards my condo I didn't see him. I called for him, but nothing. I was so tired from working overtime the past 2 days I just wanted to collapse, so I didn't go looking for him. I will forever regret that decision.

When I woke up at 0900, there was no Lucky kitty in my bed. I immediately felt the absence of his weight at my feet...because my little beasty always sprawled out across my bed. So much so that I couldn't even move my legs when he was asleep in "his spot." So when I woke up and there was no Lucky....I got immediately got worried. I tried to quell my panic by thinking maybe he was out playing or someone had kept him inside their own house last night. He was such a lover that everyone liked him and wanted to play with him. So I got up, busied myself with cleaning up after Crazy Belle...and left for work. I texted my next door neighbor Shirley to let her know Lucky was MIA, and asked her to keep an eye out for him. She loves him too, so she went out walking around calling for him..but no Lucky. I called Shirley from work at 1245 and she said she couldn't find him. I told her when he turned up to lock his little butt in the house until I got home. Such is the way with outdoor kitties....they roam, but they always come back home. Except this time.

When I answered the phone call from a 714 area code, I figured someone had found my Lucky. He had probably gotten lost and someone was calling to tell me where he was. Well, that was partially true. The man asked me if I owned a cat named Lucky? I immediately said, "yes, is he ok?" "Well, no....he's...well, oh god...um, a coyote got him." I knew from the tone in the mans voice Lucky was gone. He told me I didn't want to see Lucky how he was now....that it was pretty bad. But I've seen horrible things, and this was my baby. I had to go get him. I asked the man to cover him, which he already had, and I immediately left work to head home. Lucky was killed only a few condos over from our house, in a grassy greenbelt area near the man who called me's condo.

I cried my eyes out the whole way home, still in uniform and reeling from the suddeness of it all. I should have went looking for him....I should have kept him inside....wondering if he was in pieces like other cats I had seen who were killed by Coyotes. The man said it was BAD...that I didn't want to see him like this. I hoped that I could at least recognize my little buddy, and say goodbye. When I got there I parked and started walking towards the greenbelt area. The man had covered Lucky with a red towel. I knew his body was under the towel when I saw it, I just knew. So I walked over, crouched down, and uncovered my baby boy. There he was, his head, arms and legs all still intact, looking like my sweet sleeping boy....save for the hollowed out empty hole where his body had been. The coyotes gutted my baby and ate him....but they spared his face and feets, and for that I was grateful. The man who called me walked over and thought I was an animal control officer because of my uniform. He told me he had already called the owner of the cat. I told him through tears that I was the owner, I just came from work and was a police Officer. He was choked up too. Turns out he has a cat of his own, and knew my Lucky because he would come around the mans patio where he kept catnip. My Lucky was always such a sweet natured boy. He was more person than cat sometimes. I told the man I would be back to collect Lucky in a few minutes...and he handed me his collar which he had removed. It was all a blur....like a bad dream...

When I got to my house Shirley came out and was crying, she lost a cat to Coyotes before and understads. Pets are our family members, the loss feels the same if not worse. I borrowed a box from her to put Lucky in and walked back to where his body was. As I walked up another neighbor lady was outside, in front of her home. She was upset and crying too. Told me another neighbor had heard the fight at 0230 and knew it was a bad one. 0230....just when I was getting home. An hour late. Had I only gone looking for him....maybe....

The man asked me if I wanted gloves to pick him up. I told him no, I didn't need gloves....I've touched worse things at work...and this was my boy. I wrapped Lucky in the towel and carefully picked up my baby boy for the very last time. I placed him in the box so that I could see his little face and paws, but kept his unjuries covered. Aside from the horrible ants on him, he still looked like my little buddy. When we got back to the house I spent a few minutes stroking his little face and feet, wiping away the stupid ants, and telling him how sorry I was that Mommy wasn't home in time. The grief I feel is filled with guilt and regret....If only i'd have been there in time.

I took Lucky to the Seabreeze Pet Cemetary to have him cremated. He didn't like bugs and the thought of ants and bugs all over him didn't sit well with me. So I will keep his ashes in an urn and he will be a part of me always. The sweet boy who I saved from the freeway.....who then saved me from sadness and depression. I hope there is a Rainbow Bridge...and Lucky is waiting for me there someday. He was the best kitty ever.

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